It’s not easy to move on after a painful break up. A failed relationship can have negative impact on one’s personality and can trigger feelings of worthlessness.
It can also make a person experience fear over the thought of loving again.
Those who had gone through break ups, particularly the ones left behind, tend to have this belief that they won’t get over the experience and that it’s difficult to live their life without their ex.
They are often haunted by regrets and they tend to look for something or someone to blame for the break up.
Still, time heals all wounds. After some thinking and with the support of people who are truly concerned, one can move on and start over. It also helps to look back on the love advice you heard from other people along the way.
It may be a painful journey towards recovery and the adjustment could be difficult but “we all have an unsuspected reserve of strength that emerges when life puts us to the test.”
What can you possibly do to move on and start over after a failed relationship? Here’s some advice;
If it’s still worth fighting for, fight for your love
This may sound stupid and even pathetic but it can help you move on without feelings of regrets and uncertainties.
True love gives without asking for anything in return. If you really love someone with all your heart, fight for your love even if the chances of winning are slim. At least you can say that you’ve done your best.
This can spare you from having to ask yourself “what if” and from telling yourself “if only I did this and that”.
Once you’re done fighting, it’s natural to get tired. Only then can you move on knowing that you did your part and there’s nothing more you can do to change the situation.
Don’t look back
Once you’ve found your way to move on, don’t look back. Focus on where you want to go and plan for your next steps.
Discard anything that reminds you of the love you’ve lost and avoid clinging on to memories. It’s natural to think about your ex every now and then but know when enough is enough.
So don’t dwell on the past and start looking forward to what lies ahead of you.
Don’t blame yourself as to why the relationship failed. Instead, accept the fact that it’s over.
Forgiving yourself can pave the way to a brighter and happier future. So learn from the experience and try to be better than you were before.
Use the heartbreak to rebuild a better version of yourself who’s worthy of being loved and accepted for everything you are.
Don’t lose sight of your dreams and ambitions
The process of moving on after a break up takes time. Some need time to refocus and to realign themselves to get back on track. While some choose to immerse themselves on work, on their career and other goals.
Do whatever works best for you.
Remember that a failed relationship does not define you as a person. So whatever your goals are, continue pursuing them even after your relationship ends.
The 3-month rule
Following a break up, there’s this thing called the 3-month rule. It means that for 3 months after the break up, you should allow yourself to analyze, assess and think about the situation.
You can use this time to try to win your partner back, to work on proper closure or to think about your next steps in life.
For a period of 3 months, you’re not supposed to date or attempt to find a new love. Otherwise, this person could just be a rebound and can bring more complications and confusion to an already difficult situation.
Three months following a break up is all it takes to respect your partner and the relationship you once had.