The last thing that couples want to think and talk about is breaking up. However, the sad truth is that it happens a lot and it could happen to anyone.
Based on a recent survey made by the American Psychological Association, 50% of married couples in the U.S. end up filing for divorce.
It’s really hard to tell if a relationship or marriage would survive. The minor day-to-day details can all spell a difference including the manner of managing conflicts and ability to deal with mutual differences.
If you want to discover the most common reasons why relationships fall apart, I am giving you the top reasons why couples decide to call it quits.
Lack of communication
At the start of a relationship, couples tend to be more honest and open about their feelings. But over the course of time, things change and they start to rely on their partner’s body language in an attempt to understand them.
In a situation where conversations once existed, they are replaced by silence.
The reason could be that over time, we get too complacent and comfortable in our relationship – and sometimes even too lazy to speak our minds out – and we just stop communicating thoughtfully with each other.
You compare your relationship with that of others
Sometimes, what screws us up the most in our relationships is the picture in our heads of how things are supposed to be (or how our partners should be).
We sometimes compare our relationship with that of others that we end up looking for things or qualities that are lacking in our partners.
We should keep in mind that comparison is the thief of joy. Every relationship is unique and the best thing you could do to be happy is to appreciate what you have and to focus on the good qualities of your partner.
Sadly, this is not the case. When one party assumes that there’s something lacking in their relationship and that they are not as happy as the other couples, the relationship is doomed to fail.
Failure to make compromises
A relationship can lead to break up if one party refuses to give up his or her need to be right and to be in control at all times.
Compromising is not just all about allowing your spouse to choose where to have a vacation or where to have a romantic dinner. In a healthy relationship, making compromises means taking conscious efforts to accept each other for exactly who you are.
It means working together towards overcoming conflicts brought about by your mutual differences.
Holding on to the past
It’s always hard to focus on the present if you or your partner is clinging on to the past. Most couples break up because they are unable to move on from past negative experiences, mistakes and wrong decisions.
Failure to make peace with your past or inability to forgive your partner for past shortcomings can have a negative impact on the relationship.
Trust issues
Trust is important in every relationship. We could all agree that trust is something that’s earned over time. It takes a lot to establish it but it only takes one single mistake to lose it completely.
Couples who are unable to trust their partner for some reason usually drift apart over time. The stress and frustration brought about by lack of trust can have a negative impact to a marriage or relationship.
Self-destructive habits and unacceptable behavior
Addiction, unhealthy vices, psychological issues, domestic violence, unreasonable spending and mental problems (psychological incapacity) can all take a toll on a relationship or marriage.
And we all know that a person can only take so much when it comes to physical, mental and psychological abuse. Such destructive habits and behavior are all clear grounds for divorce and legal separation.
Cheating
Cheating or extramarital affairs is one of the top reasons why most couples call it quits and choose to go their separate ways to start over a new life.
The reason is very understandable as cheating can break trust in a relationship and leaves a trail of doubts, uncertainties and negative effects that can last for a long time.
Trying to change your partner
True love is unconditional. If the love you feel towards your partner isn’t, then it might not be genuine love after all.
One of the most crucial aspects of being tied to a relationship is to love your significant other for exactly who they are – flaws and all – without attempting to change them.
If you secretly wish that your wife or husband is more exciting, more adventurous or is bolder, you are creating an unrealistic version of how love should be.
You are not really loving the person for who he or she is. And this could eventually affect the relationship negatively.